The "Light" Side of Education

Pre-Teaching Thoughts and Experiences
   
    It is mid-February, and I have stepped off the path of continuing post-graduate work in neuroscience onto one toward becoming an elementary school teacher.  I am an in-class volunteer in a grade 4/5 split classroom. The teacher and myself are responsible for approximately thirty children, along with a CEA who works with one. The children are all uniquely wonderful, but the class composition is challenging, with six children who have diagnosed behavioural and/or learning issues. The class consists of children who come from a wide range of home environments and varying degrees of socioeconomic stability, with the catchment area encompassing a trailer park on a First Nation's reserve as well as expensive hillside mansions near a famous winery.
     One day, I was working with a particular child who often has difficulties staying focused and motivated in class. He lives in the nearby trailer park and has low self-esteem, indicated by his withdrawn manner and his frequent self-deprecating comments. That day, he was having difficulty understanding how to tell time on an analog clock. I tried explaining the lesson in as many different and imaginative ways I could come up with, but none of my approaches were clicking with him. I observed his frustration and anxiety mounting, despite my gentle reassurances. Inwardly, I myself was feeling at a loss, as I saw him begin to "shut down". But suddenly, he sat up, his eyes ablaze with comprehension, and he excitedly explained the whole concept back to me! This normally quiet and gloomy boy was all smiles and "high fives"! The light came on in this child, and this was my first "light bulb" moment.

    I have worked in other classrooms before and after this grade 4/5 split, but it was not until my experiences in this particular class that I realized how truly challenging it is to be a teacher. What I had observed made me wonder how it is possible to teach one lesson to such a variety of individuals and personalities. British Columbia public school classes average around 30 children to one teacher, and there is minimal support available to the children (and the teacher) as there appears to be a substantial shortage of CEAs and Learning Assistants in the school district I have volunteered in. Seeing the daily challenges the teacher faced trying to manage this particular group of so many different abilities and personalities made me feel overwhelmed and discouraged. The idea of myself being a teacher became daunting and I started asking myself some honest and probing questions: "Am I the kind of person who is suited to managing the stress and responsibility of guiding the positive development and learning of so many different children?" and "Is this how I really want to dedicate my time and energy?"
    Then I witnessed my first "light bulb" moment. I was reminded that school is not just a place for cognitive growth, but for personal, social, and emotional development as well. While my opportunities to witness moments of sudden light and comprehension can sometimes be painfully few and far between, the possibility of their occurrence motivates and inspires me to be a better teacher and individual. No, not everyone will get the lesson the first, second, or even third time around. Yes, this can be frustrating and discouraging for the teacher, and especially the children. But the role of a teacher is not just to teach and test academic learning. After witnessing the personal empowerment students gain through comprehension and success, I have come to see that the teacher's most important role is to foster and nurture a positive, patient, and compassionate learning environment conducive to holistic growth and light bulb moments for every child.

Hockey Nation -- One Game, Two Visions

Montreal   

    The sentiments of separatism and nationalism among French-speaking Canadians date back centuries.  Yet, even today after decades of so-called compromise and accommodation from the federal government, the fear of absorption into the pre-dominantly anglophone culture of the rest of Canada is still strong.  This fear sometimes manifests itself in the many forms of Quebec nationalism.  Most Quebec Nationalists don’t seem to agree on one form of nationalism, but the top three types seem to be territorial (Quebec sovereignty), linguistic (pro-French language) and ethnic (a pure, Francophone lineage; typically against immigration).  Two examples of particularly active pro-language groups are the Mouvement Quebec Francais and the Mouvement Montreal Francais, who work hard to ensure that the French language and culture remain dominant in the province of Quebec. 
    A recent example of this worry of the regression of French language and culture in Quebec is the french-language protest by the Mouvement Quebec Francais at a NHL Montreal Canadiens game vs the Tampa Lightning in January this year.  Montreal’s hockey team is one of the original 6 hockey teams, making it over a century old.  In its century of existence, it has always been marketed and promoted as the hockey team of French Canada.  It is especially one of the prides of Montreal, one of the oldest cities in Canada, where over 83% of the people have French as their first language. 
    Lately, there has been tension amongst Nationalist Quebecois about the music playing at home Habs games being only in English, and the announcements being bilingual instead of solely French.  This is considered disrespectful by the pro-language groups as Quebec, with 95% of its population speaking French, is officially a Francophone province, not bilingual like the rest of Canada.  There is also some disappointment that French Canada’s team has only 2 players who are actually Francophone. 
    The latest issue concerning the Montreal Habs is that despite the Canadiens’ historical record when it comes to winning Stanley cups, these days they’re actually close to being at the very bottom of the NHL team standings.  As such, their coach was fired, and a new coach was appointed by the manager this past December.  What upset the Quebec Nationalists is the new coach speaks no French, only English.  Pro-French-language protestors were up in arms, and organized a rally outside the Bell Centre at the Habs’ next home game in January versus the Tampa Bay Lightning.  They handed out Quebec flags to those coming to the see the game, chanted “Montreal, en Francais! (Montreal, in French!),” and even brought a dummy resembling the team’s president/owner and put a noose around its neck.  They argued that the team, supposedly being a representative of French Canada, should have a coach who can speak French.  More generally, hockey being “Canada’s Game,” and with Canada officially being a bilingual country, this coach, a representative of Canada’s Game, should at the very least have a grasp of both of Canada’s official languages. 
    The National Hockey League has developed into a privately owned, international organization with players coming from different backgrounds around the globe to play for North American teams.  Teams are no longer recruiting from their own backyards to represent their city; rather, they are buying and trading players internationally in the interest of forming the best team possible in the hopes of winning the most coveted prize in the NHL – the Stanley Cup.  As such, as Canada’s cultural fabric continues to become less of the “1 nation, 2 visions” model of the last century and a half and more a diverse “patchwork quilt” of people and cultures, perhaps Montreal should consider loosening its claim to their Habs as being representative of French Canada, and find pride instead in the hard work of their team’s international roster, doing what it takes to maybe one day bring the Stanley Cup back to Quebec.

Coming Home to Bliss

As I mature, the idea of figuring out where I feel most at home, most able to be me, has become more prominent in my mind.  But the more I consider the idea, the more I realize that, like happiness, that feeling of "home" isn't going to necessarily come from an external source, or physical location.

Everyone of us has experienced those moments of total bliss and contentment, but it seems as soon as those moments slip away, we start striving to get back to that place again and stay there.  Paradoxically, the very act of wanting to hold on to that happy feeling takes it away...

We go through life with these ideas and conceptions of who we are and who we’d like to be (“I’m a woman, a Canadian, I’m ambitious, loving, curious, a student, a daughter...”) and try to align ourselves with positions and people in life that reaffirm these seemingly basic and crucial parts of our identity.  Which is great.  It’s so important to foster our passions and values to elicit positive growth and create beautiful social connections.

But at the same time...all of this is quite limiting.  Imagine, cramming yourself into such a puny box of identity, when you could experience your infinitude instead!  Really, we are not (the sum of) our cognitions, our emotions, our actions, our values...Indeed, these things seem to bury our inner “self”.  Who we really “are” is the *awareness* of all these parts of us.  As soon as everything becomes stripped away, and we are living in a state of pure, present, simple awareness, that’s when I think we attain those ever-elusive flashes of bliss and contentment.

Why would I chase happiness my whole life, when bliss has been here the entire time?  One has the potential to be blissful and content, at any time, always. It just seems most of us simply aren’t ready/able to comprehend this yet.

My proposition: home is whenever/wherever you’re with *you*

Bliss, contentment, nirvana, home, inner peace...whatever you want to call that feeling, that "being," that "place" -- “You may return here once you have fully come to understand that you are always here.” --